I recently decided to leave my job because I’m moving. My colleagues threw a sōbetsukai (farewell party) for me, and I was so touched and warmed by all the presents, letters, and words of encouragement. It’s really sad not being able to see the colleagues I’ve worked with anymore, but I think the sōbetsukai is a wonderful event that lets you express your gratitude one last time. Today, I’d like to tell you a bit more about this Japanese tradition.
What is a Sōbetsukai?
A sōbetsukai is a farewell gathering held for a colleague who is transferring, relocating, or retiring. It’s an occasion to express gratitude for their past contributions, say goodbye, and offer encouragement for their future endeavors. Typically, this involves going out for lunch or having a dinner party with bosses and colleagues. While not always mandatory, it’s also common to write letters or give gifts to the person leaving.
What kind of gathering is it?
The nature of a sōbetsukai really depends on the number of people attending and who they are. When it’s a large group, you’ll typically have a toast, followed by speeches from both the person leaving and their boss. The person departing will usually share memories and experiences from their time at work, express gratitude to their colleagues, and talk about their plans for the future. Their boss, in turn, will offer words of appreciation and praise for their hard work. If it’s a smaller, more intimate group, the atmosphere tends to be more relaxed. There usually aren’t any formal speeches; instead, everyone just enjoys a meal and conversation together.
Where is the event held?
Sōbetsukai are often held at restaurants or izakaya (Japanese-style pubs) near the company, but they can also take place in company meeting rooms. For my recent farewell gathering, my boss took me to a beer bar near our workplace. There, I enjoyed a delicious meal with my colleagues. Since it was a small group, we had a relaxed atmosphere and talked about work and our personal lives. On my last day of work, we all went for beers after hours, chatting about our favorite brews and our lives in general.
What kind of gifts do you give/receive?
When it comes to gifts, common choices include bouquets of flowers, letters, or items that the departing person particularly likes. These can be purchased individually or by pooling money with colleagues. In my experience, I’ve seen groups chip in for a plant for someone who loves houseplants, or buy sweets for a colleague with a sweet tooth. We’ve even created a surprise gift by collecting messages from everyone in the company on a decorative card (shikishi).
When I was the one leaving, I received gifts like sweets, beer, an onigiri (rice ball) recipe book, seasonings, and dishes. It’s also quite common for the person leaving to buy snacks or sweets for their colleagues as a thank you for everything.
Reflection
Does your country have an event similar to a sōbetsukai? Or do you think this kind of gathering is unique to Japan given its emphasis on teamwork? While it’s certainly sad to part ways with colleagues you’ve worked alongside, it’s truly wonderful to have a dedicated occasion where you can express your gratitude one last time. A sōbetsukai can even be the catalyst that transforms a colleague into a lifelong friend.
